Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I party with great urgency now.
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