woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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