I am in a vortex of obligation.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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