He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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