bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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