i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
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I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
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No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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