Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
50% drunk capacity currently
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Randomize
