This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize