How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
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