he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Randomize