What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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