Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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