i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Dick very happy bro
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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