pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
i came on her dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you