please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
