Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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