God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
But break dance skills will only take you so far
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
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