even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
