Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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