Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Randomize