I accidentally burped into my bong.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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