ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize