No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
