Texts From Last Night

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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin

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  (330): Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin http://tfl.nu/9p6z
  Replies (1) Good night (2029) Bad night (477)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.

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  (517): dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it. http://tfl.nu/4nb9
  Replies (19) Good night (1693) Bad night (4229)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...

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  (803): For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer... http://tfl.nu/txcz
  Replies (20) Good night (4483) Bad night (861)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.

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  (412): Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record. http://tfl.nu/e6sm
  Replies (8) Good night (4750) Bad night (810)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.

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  (440): The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night. http://tfl.nu/gsoj
  Replies (8) Good night (2889) Bad night (886)
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  (310): View more from California

  I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers

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  (310): I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers http://tfl.nu/hjyr
  Replies (4) Good night (2311) Bad night (872)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"

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  (845): I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl" http://tfl.nu/lnr2
  Replies (5) Good night (1211) Bad night (741)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life

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  (214): Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life http://tfl.nu/rhcn
  Replies (3) Good night (510) Bad night (1473)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.

  (1-954): View more from Florida

  Marco

  (954): View more from Florida

  Polo

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  (954): These days, you and me are swimming in dicks. (1-954): Marco (954): Polo http://tfl.nu/zk92
  Replies (6) Good night (2497) Bad night (481)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.

  (520): View more from Arizona

  Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free

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  (520): I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high. (520): Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free http://tfl.nu/tueu
  Replies (2) Good night (1209) Bad night (392)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup

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  (715): Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup http://tfl.nu/az6p
  Replies (3) Good night (1356) Bad night (597)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was

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  (815): Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was http://tfl.nu/efhi
  Replies (3) Good night (738) Bad night (222)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible

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  (801): Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible http://tfl.nu/ks54
  Replies (3) Good night (361) Bad night (196)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry

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  (315): Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry http://tfl.nu/oid7
  Replies (5) Good night (525) Bad night (209)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up

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  (651): I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up http://tfl.nu/jq4y
  Replies (5) Good night (257) Bad night (851)

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