He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
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