Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
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composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
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I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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