My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
It was like getting head from an anaconda
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
