I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
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