Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Randomize