We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize