I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
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I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
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No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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