i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
21 Dirty Secrets From Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties That Have Destroyed Marriages
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.