I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bed smells like the plague
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Just puked most of my soul out..
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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