My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
