Where is the hickey?
worst night to have a conscience
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
All I want is dick and wine.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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