love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
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