Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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