Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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