Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
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You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
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I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
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