The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
she woke up with a sticky ear
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I went to an adult Halloween party last night dressed as Mrs. Doubtfire, but I woke up on a stranger's couch surrounded by sleeping children in karate gi's. And I accidentally flushed my granny wig mid-puke, so if they wake up I'm gonna have to convince them that I'm just a weird older man and not a terrible cross dresser.
How did you come to this point in your life?
Good bartenders.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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