No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
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