So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
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