so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
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she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
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I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator