i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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