So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
