It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
