Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I think your dad took our porno
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
be right there i have to get my cape
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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