Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize