Christians are straight up FREAKS
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??