It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
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